Friday, March 21, 2014

The Feeling Was Euphoria: I Left Everything Behind To Follow My Dreams


I can’t tell you the number of times I've stared at a blank page trying to write this down. How do you put something so beautiful, so complex, into words?

2013 was a tough year for me. I was confused about what my purpose in life was. I am aimless, shattered and hopeless. I didn't have any concrete goals to achieve and I was single after a year of being in a relationship, the longest of which lasted 3 years and ended nastily. I thought I had it all planned but I hadn't. Every day was the same routine. I would go to work and do my tasks for several hours, have lunch with the same set of people, dream about the same set of things, and then go home at night and do nothing else. At night, I read other people’s blog mostly travel blogs and envied them for being able to sell everything and just go. Until one day it hit me. TRAVEL! That’s what I have to do. It seemed like the solution for many people, why couldn’t it be the solution for mine?

In January 2014, I left my job in the Philippines and finally planned a solo trip to Dubai – my first time to go out of the country alone. I've been to Hong Kong for quite couple of times but leaving my own country alone was something big for me (a regular Filipina employee in the Philippines) that was something I could tell my grandchildren someday. Everything was a DIY, It was all me lost somewhere and it felt so darn good to be out of the office cubicle. But more than that, it felt good to not hear any complaints around me. 

After being away, I realised that I was lucky to have a job back then with the kind of economy the world is experiencing. To someone who is jobless and has to support a family, I am living the life he wants yet I shifted to new City and left everything behind - no friends, no job, away from loved ones, abandoned my best friend (my dog) how I wish I could bring her up here but was trying to start over a brand new life, chasing dreams and making it happen.

When I made up the decision to quit my job and move here, I knew there was going to be a difficult road ahead. Accepting that it won’t be easy is half the battle. Leaving my mom and dad was one of the hardest things I've ever done – leaving 26 years of my life behind me in the Philippines was tough, because it’s all I've ever known. In Philippines, I felt like I was somebody – In here, I’m a very small fish in a large pond. 

I sent out a countless number of resumes without ever hearing anything back. I went through many interviews from far places only to get the generic rejection email. I spent night after night lying in bed wondering if I had made a huge mistake. But now, finally on the right track and all of those failures, disappointments – they all made me who I am today, someone who has grown exponentially within the past year of her life.
Night scene: The Dubai Creek #mysecondhome

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